Ice Queen

Do you ever feel you have to be the strong one for everyone else? That it's your job to keep it together so you can be the pillar others lean on? I think I've felt that way my whole life. Maybe it's the caregiver in me or just my optimistic nature to always look towards the good in every situation. And I don't think it's wrong per se, but sometimes it gets in the way of allowing all that needs to be felt and expressed from coming out. Like an ice queen keeping it on lock down.

(Disclosure: This site uses affiliate links. All products are chosen at my discretion and promoted as other blogs promote products that reflect the lifestyle of the blogger, brand, and ethos. I only post brands and items I support.)

Recently I've been going through something challenging and I felt a shift in myself. I wasn't able to keep seeing the bright side. I got sucked into the 'reality of what is' and it had me gripped tight. Then I found myself in a discontented place of fear and negativity. And I was upset about that. And that made me feel ever worse. Until one night, as I was drifting to sleep I had an epiphany...

I wasn't far from myself at all. I was just going through the motions of life that reveal to us more of who we are and what we want. I was expanding. The minute I had the thought, I felt relief. I felt the judgement I had placed on myself for not being stronger or more positive lift off of me and I truly felt elated. Sometimes it is so easy to make feeling bad or uncertain or sad wrong, but I think without them we might be bored and stagnant. They move us forward by revealing the complexity of who we are and showing us more of what we want (sometimes by showing us what we don't want). It felt like a movie director pulling back to see the full scene, and I could appreciate the role of those hard feelings. So now, I remain committed to my default way of being (positive and uplifted) and hold space for the other emotions that show up too. No need to freeze them out. They're part of the bigger picture.

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Eco Outfit Details

CINDY CASCADE GOWN Nha Khan via Rent the Runway #sharedfashion

PLAID CASHMERE SCARF #naturalfibers

I'm sure you've heard me talk about renting fashion before, and I can't get enough of this genius concept! For this shoot, I knew I wanted to create something more artistic and a gown in the snow felt like the perfect thing. I do have a couple of gowns in storage (one of them is my high school prom dress!), but I wanted something to fit my vision and with my Rent the Runway Unlimited subscription a plethora of gowns and designers were at my fingertips! The best part is this gown will be warn many times- not just once or twice by moi if I had bought it. Shared fashion is one of my favorite ways to participate in sustainable fashion, and it is oh so stylish. 

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SHOP THE POST

Many thanks to Cole Buckhart for yet another awesome shoot! 

Go Your Own Way

I'm currently enrolled in Brooke Castillo's Self Coaching Scholars program. Jess Lively (one of my favorites in the self growth sphere) interviewed her on the Lively Show podcast (many thanks Eunique from Stranded On Land for introducing me!) and I felt like, 'That's my coach.' I'd been curious about life coaching and felt like the topic kept coming up amongst my girlfriends. I wanted coaching on how to go above and beyond my current potential and put some effort in that space to see what I could unlock. It takes work, and the work is worth it.

(Disclosure: This site uses affiliate links. All products are chosen at my discretion and promoted as other blogs promote products that reflect the lifestyle of the blogger, brand, and ethos. I only post brands and items I support.)

I'm really enjoying SCS. Brooke is a no nonsense lady with a big heart, and she provides amazing structure and a model to work through on the daily to get in the right mindset to achieve your dreams. If you need a kick in the butt to get going, you should listen to her podcast on productivity. Talk about getting shit done!

Everything was going great and then this last week I kind of hit a speed bump. So much of what Jess talks about on the Lively Show is about flow, and I did her Flow With Intention Course in the spring and it set me on a totally new trajectory for which I am very grateful. I feel like I'm having to balance the action oriented structure of SCS with the 'go with the flow' approach that Jess shares. This past week was challenging. I struggled to find my way and what felt like the 'right way' of working. 

Luckily, I went on a walk with my friend Liz Gibbs, who simply stated that we can take in the advice and methodology of others and then we have to make it our own. The good news is, we really do know how to make it our own. Just listen to yourself and you'll feel the guidance. She reminded me of this, and I felt it right away. 

Brooke's structuring is a little overboard for me, and that's okay. I can be inspired by her methods and then apply them as they work for me (ie: planning out each week instead of the entire month). I do the same with what I am getting from Jess. I do think that finding that good feeling before I act is important, and I'm leaving room in my schedule for that, while balancing my 'to do' list from Brooke. 

It feels important to have goals and things we are invested in and building or working towards. At the same time, I think it's necessary to enjoy life in the current moment and allow time for the things and people we enjoy. I'll admit that finding the balance isn't always easy, but being aware of it and putting attention there feels like a step in the right direction. In the end, I hear Fleetwood Mac in my head telling me to... 'Go your own way!'

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Eco Outfit Details

LEATHER JACKET, The Sway, $600 #upcylcedleather #ethicallymade

KNIT DRESS (similar to one shown), Everlane $38 #ethicallymade #transparent

BAG, Ona Villier $145 #handmade #artisanmade #ethicallymade 

BOOTS (similar to one shown), Everlane $225 #madeinItaly #ethciallymade #naturalfibers  

Looking for handmade, high quality bags that you can afford? Enter Ona Villier. Their bags are artisan made in the Mediterranean using bovine leather from Spain and Italy. FMG readers can take 20% off when you use the come 'welcome20' at checkout. 

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